Denver....STILL.

So.....

News on my end is not so good. Cara finally made a decision and plans regarding her summer and a road trip south...so what now Cara!?!

Well....

My road trip partner and coconspirator bailed on me on the 4th of July! Hooray! Those pretty fireworks erupting on the Denver skyline mocked my pain! lol. On the day of the 4th, Ryan and I found a rider, Darren (a really nice English backpacker), to go with us all the way to Memphis! This is what we had been waiting for. I had lined up people in New Orelans and beyond but we needed someone to share gas with us along the way.

For Ryan this made it all to real and he reliased with full certainty that he wanted to be a lone wolf...so we had planned to leave Denver on the 5th but instead Ryan headed to Pheonix, AZ. The ultimate irony was that he needed a ride to his method of Denver departure and, of course, I dropped him off! Like giving a prisoner a spoon I joked! We are still on good terms. Half of me respects his decision and understands while the other half of me feels DITCHED and angry....but the anger disapated after a day....now I am just tired....emotionally.

So I decided 'to hell with it', I'm going! I packed everything up and was all ready in the car with poor Darren. Ice chest packed, laundry still drying and hanging from hooks on the roof.....and I just had a bad feeling. I was not excited. I was hestistant. I felty like I needed to call someone...a lot of someones. After Darren jumped out in Memphis, I would most likely be driving from Memphis to New Orleans solo, something I never planned on and did not like. The trip was not as well planned as I would have liked and when we were planning Ryan and I said we would not leave Denver without another rider. So why the hell was I leaving with only 1 other person and on top of that driving alone for a large portion of the trip!?!

SO I STOPPED!

So anyway, I am still in Denver!!! Cara loves Denver apparently, just can't leave! Karlee (my first couchsurfing host) came to rescue me and chat and I am now staying with her again...she is wonderful!

I am not trying to find a road tripper replacement...I don't think it is possible. I am working out what to do next. Either go back to CA via plane or drive Jenny (the name of my van) back. If I drive back I'll either sell her or maybe do another trip. If I leave her in Denver I would have to return to get her. In all honesty, I am not sure what I am up for after being completely stressed after Road Trip #1 out and having plans change on me (did a bit of crying) for Road Trip #2.

As elusive as ever, the future is always a mystery,

Cara =)